THE LAST DITCH An Englishman returned after twenty years abroad blogs about liberty in Britain
Goodbye Yoko

Safe in Cannes

I breakfasted handsomely at my castle hotel in Italy, looking out at the splendid landscaped gardens, which must alone cost many thousands to maintain. I was alone for dinner in the restaurant last night and there was only one couple in the breakfast room this morning. I am a little puzzled as to the hotel’s business model, but I hope they keep making it work. It really is a beautiful place. There was some kind of banquet, complete with speeches and national anthems, there last night, so maybe the business is driven by events? Not that I have another marriage in mind, but it would be a marvellous wedding venue. 

Nira and I set off after breakfast to make our way to my friends’ home in Cannes. There was an accident on the autostrada on the way there, and I saw the cab of a large truck embedded in a tunnel wall when we eventually passed the spot. This incident caused us to come to a halt for half a hour or so while it was dealt with. I got to see how French and Italian drivers respond to being stationary on a motorway. Many got out, stretched their legs, sunned themselves and had picnics on their cars. 

They seemed quite relaxed about it. The two lanes of traffic had squeezed to the edges to allow the emergency service through with impressive efficiency. One burst of the leading cop car’s siren had us all manoeuvring helpfully. I feel sorry for the truck driver, but it was nice not to be the person in trouble today. 

After an otherwise uneventful run, I enjoyed the increasing familiarity of my surroundings as I neared my old haunts in Cannes. I updated my friends’ local concierge on my ETA by texting using Siri. We arrived at the door of their beautiful holiday home at almost precisely at the same time.

I am now ensconced in considerable luxury, having brought in my luggage, showered and taken a cooling dip in their pool. I hope, gentles all, you don’t feel too let down by such an uneventful travelogue! I’m afraid Nira and I will be working hard to keep it so! 


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John Miller

I like uneventful …

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